"Proximity to power deludes some into thinking they wield it."
-Francis Underwood (House of Cards)
Have you ever felt far from God? Overwhelmed by guilt and a sense of separation. On the other hand, have you felt closer to God? You felt in tune with God's radio station and obedient to every letter of scripture. One day you're on the highest mountain and the next you're in the darkest valley. This is the picture I had of church. Either you're a spotless Christian or a sinning "back-slider." This is the way of thinking that has left me beaten and broken more times that I care to admit. How much sin would it take to go from Christian to "back-slider?" Could an abundant amount of failure separate me from God forever? Is it really "Once save, always saved?" These questions rocked me to my core.
"Back-slider" is a term popularized by mainstream Christian folk. The definition pertained to the state of one's relationship with Jesus. It operates under the assumption that you are sliding away something rather than towards something. It means that you were moving closer to God, but now you're moving away from him. This is a demeaning term used to describe people who have experienced failure. It may have been the child out of wedlock or the porn addiction. In either one of these situations, it's not the failure that determines the state of you're relationship with God. The factor that determines the state of the relationship is the need to struggle. The need to carry on with the relationship despite your failure. The struggle separates the defeated from the victorious. I've found this train of thought to be revolutionary to my relationship with Jesus. The truth that the validity of my relationship with Jesus didn't rest on my failure, but his victory. I can beat myself up daily or I can rest assured that his Grace is more than the sum of my failure. Therefore, I don't believe that the term "Back-slider" is an adequate way to describe the abundance of someone's failures.
Have you ever been labelled a sinner? An ungodly monster or even an infidel? All of these can be used to describe the human race. Whether you are part of a church or never stepped foot into a congregation. If someone has ever said that their not a sinner then they are making God out to be a liar. Everyone under the sun has sinned and having faith in Jesus can't change that. Even after entering into a relationship with Jesus you will still sin daily. Therefore, our feeble attempts to live according to God's word have to be met with God's Grace. God's grace is made perfect in our weakness. God knows that we are weak, that's why he sent Jesus. Jesus came to make a way for sinners like me to enter into a relationship with God. I can try all I want to live according to God's word, but the only thing that allows me to go to heaven is Jesus.
Lack of sin or godly living won't matter without Jesus. Jesus is the only reason we get to walk with God. "Back-sliders" and sinners will inherit God's kingdom through Jesus. You can live your life as a Pharisee in private or a sinner out in the open. Either way you choose won't change the fact that as humans we fail. Whether you hide it or not, everyone is united by this. Labelling people outside of your belief system won't exempt you from the same judgement they will face one day. It only serves as a grisly reminder that the reason that so many churches lose people is themselves.
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